• Deeper Events - Megan

5 Ways to Make Instant Friends

If you want to meet people or have more friends, sometimes it can be tough. Usually making friendships takes time and commitment. Of course, that is part of the process and the enjoyment of the deepening friendship. With the many obstacles of modern life making it slightly more difficult to establish friendships, wouldn't it be nice to know how to make instant friends? Making instant friends isn't a myth and is definitely achievable. Having friends makes life much more meaningful and rich. Lets learn how to cultivate friendship and create it instantly.. here are some tips below to make more instant friends.

1. Have more natural, organic meetings with new people and learn to share. 

If you notice people that makes friends easily, it is because they open themselves up to people more easily. They more easily share who they are and what they think with people they just met. Most probably because they have engaged with more people in their lives.

In certain places in the world and times in history it was easier to create quick friends because people engaged much more with each-other. In large cities it is easier to find loads of people, but harder to find one of those people who will engage with you. The trick is to be around people who want to engage. Go to friendly communities, live with many (friendly!) people, seek out new encounters and gatherings with people. Whenever there is an opportunity to introduce yourself and meet someone, take it. Sometimes, if you are serious about being completely open, and learn how to make quick and easy friends, you have to seek out those opportunities. You have to travel or go out and talk to a stranger, for example. 

2. Be Open

Be ready and wiling to share about yourself to anyone. Yes, anyone. That person who comes to you and starts a conversation. Unless they have a malicious intent, have a conversation. Be more open to the idea of conversing with strangers or anyone who crosses your path. Be less suspicious of people and have more the assumption that most people are good and you can have a conversation with them. In certain situations yes you need to be careful. But in general you must adopt this approach.

3. Share something you are excited about

People take a lot from your first impression as thats all they know about you so be ready and able to share something you are excited and passionate about so they can see that you’re full of great energy. People want to be around people with great energy who are involved in projects they are passionate about. Also, have a few stories up your sleeve in case the conversation goes dry!

4. Give them full eye contact and greet them fully

Greet someone ‘fully’ versus not can make a big difference to whether you will be instant friends. If you completely open up your body to that person, give them full eye contact, a smile, a handshake.

5. If you know anything at all about them lead with that

We are very much more likely to make friends with someone whom we feel is part of the greater fabric of our lives. If someone is involved in one of your communities, has similar hobbies or knows someone you are much more likely to warm to them. So if you have anything related to that person at all in your mind, bring it up at the start. Give them the feeling that you know something about them already, you are familiar.

6. Decide you are friends

You see, many of us wait for the signals from the other person that we should be friends with them. We wait for it to feel ‘right’ before we make friends. Basically, we wait until we actually are already friends with someone before we decide in our minds that we are friends with them. Too many people hold back. Friendship takes investment, but the truth is friendship is just about a decision in your mind. And you can make that decision before you feel that person is your friend, you can make it before you feel ready. You can accept that person into your life and your heart before you get to know them fully. Why? Because in reality even if we make friends with everyone, as long as you have boundaries and can say ‘no’ friends won’t take anything from you, they will only add to your life. So you are really struggling to make friends, just make a decision and go for it. Think of them as a friend, talk to them as friend and feel it to be true before it is and will become. 

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